I found the early stages overwhelming because we had so much stuff, but mentally easy because the items we were parting with didn't have too much sentimental value to me. I saw each item as unimportant and replaceable if need be. As a matter of fact, I have felt that way pretty much through the whole experience up until now. Also, moving into the camper and living in it for a while now really puts space and clutter into perspective!
In the beginning, we got rid of things like excess kitchen items, bathroom clutter and way too many blankets and sheets. Passing on the games we no longer played and books that we would never read or use again was pretty easy. I did struggle a bit with some of the kids old school books and items that we had paid a lot of money for at the time, but other than that it wasn't very difficult. This was all while we were still in the house in Virginia. I figured that I was better at this than other people because I hadn't really felt the pain of letting go yet. Well, needless to say, I had only scratched the surface of what was to come.
I pretty much figured we had disposed of all we were going to and I was okay with that. Well, plans changed as the often do. Justin and I discussed it and decided to give what we had left to our adult children. We made the decision not to store our extra stuff for years on end. We realized it would be cheaper in the long run to purchase these things again if we decided to move back into a regular house down the road somewhere. At the same time, we thought that our adult children who are out on there own now may benefit from having these things. We especially thought that they could use the furniture as it is of really good quality. It took us years to be able to buy nice things, so this will give them a jump start.
We are done passing on the easy items. Onto the tough stuff. The emotional stuff. This is when I really found out how hard it is to let go. I have things that I have kept from childhood that really aren't of any true value in a monetary sense. However,I have an emotional attachment to many of the things I need to part with now. I also have many items that belonged to my Mama before she passed.
Here's the thing. I have held onto many of my Mama's things simply because they belonged to her. I think it was like I still had a piece of her if I kept those things. When in truth, I don't even know if these items had any true value to her and unfortunately she isn't here to ask. I have love letters from boyfriends she had and little trinkets that I don't even know what they are. But, they were hers so I kept them. It's been 20 years on the 15th of February that she passed, and I still have all of these things. Well, at least I did. I have already begun the process of letting go of some of these things, but it hasn't been easy and it's not over yet.
I still have my wedding dress, Mama's wedding dress, wedding albums and baby books. All my picture albums and home movies. Many, many cards and letters from my husband, kids, my Mama and Daddy as well as my friends. So it came down to making some very necessary decisions. Not easy, but extremely helpful in this process. I am really focusing on keeping what means the very most to me. The items that would cause me true grief if I had to part with them permanently. Surprisingly, up until now, not much has made the cut.
Top of my list of must keeps though were pictures, movies and letters. Then I had items that needed to be passed on to the kids or extended family. So I am currently in the process of transferring all of the VHS tapes to DVDs and saving a copy to my hard drive. That will save tons of space. I went through all the cards and letters, saving only the ones that were the most special to me. I have taken pictures of my Mama's yearbooks and will be passing those on to my brother. I also took pictures of mine and Justin's yearbooks and we parted with those. The kid's baby books are being passed on to them as well as all of their baby items. My wedding dress is going to my second daughter because she would like to use pieces of it in her own gown one day. This one made me happy! Not sure what to do with my Mama's dress now though. Still pondering that one.
So I am down to my Mama's hope chest and my own hope chest. They are filled with the most precious items to me and I think they were to her as well. So this part is going to be harder than anything I have had to do yet. I am trying to condense it down to one or two totes that I can store in the loft of our 5th wheel. So grateful for that loft right now.
This has been such an incredible process. I have felt so many emotions, from exhilarated to sad and everything in between! I have learned a lot about life, what's important. I have learned even more about myself...I have definite emotional hoarding tendencies ha ha! I can look at the personal items that I have held onto all these years and tell that I am attached to my memories through things. For instance, I had yearbooks all the way back to kindergarten, Valentine's day cards from the 3rd grade, my Brownie uniform and my recreational cheer leading uniform...and the list goes on!
So in the end I am learning to let go. I am learning what items are truly of value to me and what items simply weigh me down. It isn't easy, but it is very necessary for me to de-clutter the past so that I can clear a beautiful space for the present and the future. Besides, the memories are all still in my mind, heart and soul. Having the tangible item or not, those memories will always be there. And I will have photos to jog my memory when the time comes, as it surely will, when I don't remember so easily anymore.
Peace and blessings
